I wanted to write about this in a facebook status, but in honesty it is bit dark and I'm not actually feeling that way at all, so why pollute my greater link with all around me?
So I got stuck on this thought;
"For in true, be it good or evil, the things that not said are in fact more horrible than those that are".
I got stuck on it because I feel like I had read this somewhere, but also that it's possible I thought it up. There's a lot going on upstairs and NO ONE is filing any of it.
But anyhow!
I got stuck on this and had hesitation about writing it on Facebook due to the fact not everyone would understand, likely misinterpreting it as something dark or depressing. Where really it's more of an analysis of a thought.
While something might be good nature, if it is not spoken aloud it is therefore not able to be felt by anyone but the one that thinks it, which is of course horrible.
While something might be evil nature, if not spoken aloud means that it is in fact too horrible for anyone else to know but the one that thinks it.
I suppose it's my own question about what really goes on in the minds of others as they speak with me. What are the holding back? What aren't they telling me because it is in fact too horrible and they believe I can't handle it. Is it really that horrible? Could they be secretly torturing their souls in fear that I would torture their souls instead?
As you can see, or rather you are reading, this isn't a thought process that I can continue on with for quiet some time purely on theory.
I'm not sure it really has relevance, but does writing a blog have that in the first place? The only different from writing your thoughts in a diary to this is that in fact others can see it for the horrible thing that it is, but they can't see me. You can express your horrible sins and receive no real judgement of anything that would be considered harsh. We are 'just chatting, or rationalizing' here after all. It's a bit disconnected, which is why you are here in the first place.
Calm down now... have a drink...don't think too hard...it will all pass.
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